Crutches are fun!

I should probably clean my room. but I'm not gonna tonight. I'm gonna sleep. I know right! Sleep? It's a new concept for me too. My school district apprently hates my school excusively because we're the only school that starts at 7:25. Guess what time I got up today? 7:18. And I walk to school. It might help that I live about 10 yards from the school because it's in a highly residential area. But that also dosne't help because it's built up and not out. So that means everything is accessible by stairs . And only stairs. Covered in all sorts of disgusting goo and wrappers left from lunch. Oh alright, plus three elevators for the lucky bastards on crutches. Yes, you heard me, people like being injured at my school. Except for right now, beacuse there are only two available! Sorry injured poeple! Have fun getting to your third story classroom without an elevator! Anyways, I had to climb the crowded stairs to get to my Drama class on the second floor and barely made it. It was a perfect example of saved by the bell. I just didn't know I could get ready that fast! Of, course, I DID look like crap for the whole day but at least tommorrow I'll look a little better! Why is that you ask? Because I guess the district was almost sued for the sleep depriving schedule so they give us another hour on Fridays to torture the teachers with droning conferences and let us have a more relaxed morning. And less school! It still seems to take longer though. Now, I must go prepare to lip sync in front of 42 people for class tommorrow. And sleep. Goodnight!
P.S: The trash cans at my school are purple painted toxic waste barrels. Literally. The purple makes them more festive! They aren't bolted down... hmmm....wonder why no one takes em?

I Have a Green Thumb but My Plants are Dying Anyway

I was just eating sugary green candy powder in a bag, okay? No need to worry about the health of my thumb. But my plants are dying. You can worry about their health. Anyway, It's Valentine's Eve. I don't have a Valentine this year. Aww.. I know so sad. I'll write more about my sadness tommorrow. More of what sucks is that I went to the orthodontist today. Just to let you know,I hate Ortho appointments just like the majority of people with these modern day racks on their teeth. Today was just a 25 minute appointment. 20 minutes consisted of waiting in a tropically decorated waiting room, the last 5 were to actually fix the strips of metal glued to my choppers. It was pouring rain outside so the rain machines that frames the entrance wasn't making anyone feel like they were being transported to any rain forests or mystical islands. Just made everyone feel as though the rain was somehow following them, everywhere they went. You can never escape the freezing droplets of water! Just try! Hahaha ....okay, that was weird. This is why I shouldn't be left alone. Especially on Valentine's Eve. Anyway, to explain why I had to be dragged back there was because of the klutzy assistant I always seem to get. I'll sum up the last appointment for you:
- She poked me in the eye with a long platic tube that had been sucking up my spit hard enough that I started crying.
- I had a bracket with glue dropped onto my neck then was told "Don't move." Trust me. I didn't. Especially when they reached for it with really sharp tools...
- She left a very sharp metal peice on my bracket, then let me go. I really hate her for that. Let's just say that my lip has been bleeding.
So yeah... the bracket apprently lost some glue or somethin cause it didn't stay on. When they took a look at my teeth, the wonderful, non-klutzy assistant I had today informed me that I didn't need it at all anyway. The whole point of the appointment last time was to put that sucker there! Why the heck did they do that if I didn't need it! I look to one of my favorite movies for the answer:
"Doctors are sadists who like to watch lesser people scream." -Juno
Which I personally believe really describes dentists and or orthodontists if they are really any different more than doctors. Because doctors can help. Sometimes.

Plastic Hot Dogs and Space Cadets

It's been a long week and a lot of things have changed in my life. I'm no longer in Stick Woman's English class. Ahh...:( I know... no more Stick Woman Chronicles for now, although I still have horrifying past experiences that I can tell you about at a later time. Now I'm in my dream English class, which is great except that I'm leaving behind some really amazing friends in what used to be my only class with them. Next my parents finally have their own shower again after sharing mine for three years! Yes! I can officially bathe without having to ask first! Well, for those of you you who like YouTube, you may have heard of Neil Cicierega, Ryan Murphy, and Max Pacheco. For those of you who don't you need to go get your butt onto Youtube and view their awesome creative works! Recently, Max Pacheco uploaded this video which I think accuratly illistrates my brain working from the moment I wake up to third period. Now go become a fan...


Here, have a Neil Cicierega peice:

Meet my School Day. I'm Screaming on the Inside, Really.

I am invisible. People brush past me like I'm air in the hallways. Then I go up the stairs like a salmon going upstream thanks to all the people coming from the third story. Who thought it was a good idea to put the entire football team on the third story during the same period? Escalators could really work here... Finally I reach the tortures of English. My teacher is a stick. Literally. She drinks 10 cups of coffee a day and I would not be suprised if she starts doing cartwheels any second now. The man on the P.A. comes on as he does faithfully every morning however unaware that no one is listening to him. His drone is starting to lull me to sleep. Stick woman says " Shh..." to be a dutiful teacher although she dosen't even look at us when she does that. The P.A. becomes slightly more defined now. I can pick out, " Background... water... Tuesday." Okay, I'll be sure to do that. Stick woman's lecturing us on the evils of soda today. She dosen't understand how people can drink all those sugary drinks all day. It's from a can! She does this all while clapping and jumping up and down. Honestly, I don't care if you think Dr. Pepper is going to cause the apocalypse. Sigh... now it's back down the stairs of hell to endure pilates and step aerobics from Gilad, Israeli workout wonder. L.A. is the only place on Earth where you can stretch for physical eduacation that I know of. Who knew it could make you feel so much like you just got puched? I give nicknames to every single one of the outdated "fit" people that teach us aerobics through cheesy workout videos. Such as liposuction lady, who's obviously had some work done, and The Worm, who has no bones.
Meet Gilad/ Gaylad:










(Thank gosh we don't have to wear those! Ughh... cringe!)
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